1. |
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The holes that came with your clothes
Paying to self-diagnose
I want to fix things in good repair
Ignore what’s missing, focus on what’s not there
Let yourself be weak
Prayers half-pronounced, falling asleep
Let it scab. Regrow some skin you never had
You’re numb and calloused, but you can feel it pressing
Left you there a couple days
Watched you pass the time but never change
I grew on you like vines on stone
I fall at your feet, it’s seasonal
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2. |
Long Time Coming
03:07
|
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Saw you walking in circles almost three years in a row
You said, “My legs are gonna be real strong once I figure out where to go
And yours won’t. No, yours won’t.”
I did a lot of thinking about new ways to think
Without changing a thing
And I found an answer when I was by myself
You were the only one that I couldn’t tell
Some things can be carefully disassembled
Not everything has to fall apart
It was a long time coming, but only from the start
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3. |
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You know, there’s a point where looking for answers
Becomes more of a habit and less of a comfort
I checked all the locks in my house and then it flooded
I know they say that possessions can be replaced
But why are photographs so effective?
Are memories made collecting or collected?
Not to complain but sometimes it gets depressing
How almost your entire skillset is investments your parents made
Almost 20 years before they knew who you’d want to be
I know it’s petty but I’d love to be reimbursed
For all those extra years you get to spend with her
Cause I didn’t have the tools or words at the time
To articulate a complex situation
I didn’t want you as a mirror
Because I only saw myself from my own perspective
Where I could frame any affection as penance
If I could do it all again, I’d probably just make different mistakes
In new and almost impressive ways
So I don't dwell too much on who I was at the start
It’s still growth if it’s growing apart
I scavenged most of my discernible traits
Off the corpse of someone who looked a lot like me
And I don’t think I’m as ashamed of that as I should be
Cause I never paid too much attention to how it all panned out for him
He’s gone now, and I’ve got to live with it
You were kept like literature
Like a catalog or scripture
To be picked up, and quoted, and put back down
Like a diary left out
Not learned from, just learned about
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